Destinies can been shuttered because of how we handle ourselves today. The Bible states that love others the way you love self. But nowadays many do not even love themselves and they do so many nasty things to self.
I have compiled some of them and would like you to think about them with an open mind. If you are affected, then I think you need help. Do not bury your head in the sand and live as normal, just seek for help. Be nice to yourself.
Judging ourselves harshly.
We harbor unforgiving spirit because of the past. We made mistakes I agree. We failed because we were not cautious. We destroyed what we had made and worked for. We are down and feel unwanted even in our communities. We find ourselves in the rock bottom!
If we live in such a situation in our minds we may destroy ourselves. There is a need to accept whatever happened is done and cannot be reversed. After this we need to rise up by forgiving ourselves. Then we need to ask others to forgive us. This is where to start. I have discussed at length forgiveness in my book Victory in Adversity nugget #9 which is currently sold as ebook in smashwords.com.
Walking in the opinions of others
Any time you walk the opinion of other people, you are bound to fail. Many may have died as other people’s copies. When you live the way people want you to live, desiring to be in line with what they want you to do and be, you will live a very miserable life. You need to live your own life only if that life you want to live is morally right. If you are happy doing what you love, live it without regret. For example you love to live in the village, if someone tells you to live in the city because of the reasons better known to him or her, then you have a choice to live in the village because that is where your heart is at peace. You will be more productive in the place your are naturally connected to than an artificial place where people think is best for you.
Many have the opinion of what they think about you, but it is in your power to choose what is best for you as per what you think about yourself and your future. Do not allow your dreams to be killed at the mercy of soothing other peoples ego. Kindly follow your heart and do what is acceptable in the society.
Living above our standards
There is a great disservice when one lives above his standard. Many people have gone to stress and depression because they live above what they have. You shall get a person living in a $70 rental house whereas he should be living in a $40 dollar house. If the income of this person is $120 then he or she will be living above the standard. This person cannot save any penny. The person will struggle in debts because the budget for other things like food, school fees, clothing, water and electricity bills, social networking, medical bills and other bills will need to be footed.
This person will be tempted to take a loan to merge the ends that are loose. This will lead to too much stress at the end of it and may lead to depression.
Always remember the 50/30/20 budgeting rule. 50% goes to housing, food, utilities or services like studies, car payment or any other payment plan like land ownership or leasing and insurances. The 30% goes to wants like shopping, dinning out and hobbies like going for outings, cinemas and so on. The 20% goes to savings and debt payments. This is calculated after salary deductions like taxes and other statutory deductions. in other words your net pay or income.
Living in self-denial
In time we make some decisions that leave us into a fix, there is a tendency to deny the truth. Any time life changes from best to worse, we tend to think that situations are still the same. People who were once commanding authority in financial avenues, business or corporate world, social and spiritual arenas and so on continue with the same status quo.
If you had wealth and it is no more, you need to read just to the life today. Denying this truth will put you into a fix whether you like it or not. If your spouse or child or parent died, then you need to accept. Acceptance bring quicker healing and a good start over. This is the way to go. Your future is more important than your today. Arise and shine, be yourself and start where you are.
Thinking we are smarter than anyone else around us
Sorry to be a little harsh with you guy. Some counsels are harsh and unappealing but they help minds to think on the right direction. Any time you think you are smarter than everyone around you, you are treading on the wrong road of life. You shall destroy your future with such an attitude.
Many like me have gone into great error by thinking that I do not need X, Y and Z to help me in my decision making. Opinions from people does not mean you are unable to live your life, but you make your life better. The saying,”No one has the monopoly of knowledge” is a good footing for each one of us. It also helps you to measure your understanding of the concept in question.
Socrates the Greek Philosopher, who is said to be the wisest man in Athens, always prepared to admit his own ignorance rather than pretend to know something he did not. Let us emulate him and we shall do justice to ourselves.
Calling God when only in problems and a last resort
Many a times we run to the Deity when things have gone out of hand. This is a thing that should not be so. How do you feel when a friend, son or daughter comes to you as the last rescuer after everyone else. We need not to be like this. We all need our inner peace which comes from the Almighty God. May be we are in a fix because we have not given Him a chance to take over as first. We are waiting for things to settle for themselves. We think somehow a friend will come to our rescue. Though we might be waiting for our freedom, rescue or any other help from any quarter, let us not make God the last. Let Him be the first.
In conclusion, we are made to conquer. We have to make a decision to forge ahead and do better each day. You have great dreams, I know for sure, do not pin yourself down with small things that need only a decision to shake off. Be good to yourself and do justice to yourself too.
I leave you to add to the list…. Thanks for reading.
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Powerful insights here bro.(Nasty things we do to ourselves) ,you were speaking directly to my soul.am blessed,keep up the good work
Thanks brother. Keep on reading.